This week’s Provision features a guest writer, Rosemarie Rossetti, Ph. D. After being crushed by a tree in 1998, Rosemarie’s life was tragically and permanently changed. But it wasn’t all for the worse. Read on to learn how to cope with and grow through adversity without becoming bitter or broken.
I just returned from our first Trek for Life Weekend. It was a fantastic experience that will generate more opportunities and enthusiasm for future weekends. Here were some comments people made at the end of the weekend. The weekend “integrated body and mind to recognize and realize my potential.” I “learned principles for living.” The new eating habits “were achievable, affordable, and enjoyable.” These were “not just exercises for the mind, they also fed the soul and nourished the body.” It “helped me create a plan and acquire the tools to make a real life change.” This was about “claiming your PASSION • Peace, Action, Space, Surrender, Introspection, Opening of eyes, and New opportunities.”
Sound like you missed something special? If you weren’t there, you did. But don’t worry. Our next trek for life weekend takes place in the spring.
Before we start in on our next Provision series, I invited the cousin of LifeTrek coach Christina Lombardo to write this week’s Provision. Rosemarie Rossetti, Ph.D., is a motivational speaker, trainer, consultant, and writer. She is also a paraplegic. I’m sure that Rosemarie’s story will inspire many LifeTrek readers to face our own adversities with greater creativity and courage. Reflecting on how adversity brings personal growth, Rosemarie writes:
“We all experience crisis in our lives. Setbacks such as illness, divorce, layoffs and deaths in our families often come unexpectedly. Our future happiness and success are determined by how we react to our misfortunes. We can learn how to be more resilient from others.
As a survivor of a life-changing event, I have learned from experience how to bounce back in the face of adversity. On June 13, 1998, I was crushed by a large falling tree while riding my bicycle on a pathway. As a result, I am paralyzed. Lost is my ability to stand or walk without the aid of crutches, something most of us take for granted. I am dependent on my wheelchair for getting me around the house and community. Coping with the losses that this tragedy brought me, has been extremely difficult.
When all your hopes and dreams are suddenly shattered, your life is rocked to the core. You look within yourself to find strength. A large dose of self-determination and tenacity can project you forward.
In order to restore my independence, which I so desperately wanted to regain, I had to learn to do many things all over again. This time in a new way. Simple tasks like dressing and showering seemed impossible. I wanted my life back, the way it was before I was injured. My guiding motivation is that there will be a hopeful future. I do what is necessary to move towards restoring function and mobility.
In the past year and a half I have gained new insights on how to step forward after the adversity changed my life. I discovered that by setting goals, more progress was being made. The progress that you want to achieve needs to be in the form of written goals. Make a mental note of what small steps you need to initiate and accomplish in order to achieve your goals. These steps become tasks to attain. In my continuing journey of recovery and rehabilitation, I have learned many lessons that I have turned into rules to live by.
One simple guideline I follow in order to accomplish my goals is to do something new every day. No matter how small the act, let any activity count. You are the judge. Each new pursuit should be in line with your goals.
An example of a new task I was determined to do was putting on my shoes. I had to learn how to get dressed in my wheelchair. My shoes were the last item of clothing that I needed assistance putting on. My feet are paralyzed and I use my hands and arms to position my shoes on my feet. This task involved having the ability to bend one leg and cross it on top of the other knee. It also involved strengthening and flexing the muscles in my legs in order to bring my foot to my knee. A series of exercises which I performed at home resulted in the needed strength and flexibility. Each day brought me closer to the joy of victory. After about a month of practicing, I was finally able to independently put both shoes on my feet.
The act of doing something new every day needs to be a conscious habit. Upon awaking in the morning, and before getting out of bed, focus on what the new activity will be for that day. Your conscious mind may come up with the behavior immediately. If nothing comes to mind, allow your subconscious mind to work on it throughout the day. It is important that you resurface the thought of doing something new, then take action to complete the task.
This may be hard to accomplish at first. The day can get away from you. Do what you can in the time remaining before you sleep. Then the next morning, start contemplating an activity that is feasible to accomplish for that day.
You may find yourself resisting new activities. Sometimes we put up mental roadblocks and say, ‘I can’t.’ Recognize when you mentally limit your pursuits because you believe that you can’t accomplish the task. What at first seems impossible may just likely be possible.
It is important that you recognize your progress and take pride in your accomplishments. Share your achievements with others. Brag a little. The recognition and support of those around you is nurturing.
Adversity precedes growth. As you start working towards your goals and realizing progress, you will be encouraged to attempt activities that are ever more challenging in the days ahead. Take time to look back. Looking back teaches you how far you have come and reinforces your belief in your abilities. Soon you will see that the crisis in your life has brought you new insights and meaning. You will become different in some way having had to face the adversity.”
To book Rosemarie Rosettii, Ph. D. for an inspirational speech, contact her at (614) 471-6100. You can also visit her on the Web at http://www.RosemarieSpeaks.com. You can read more of her writing in Volume Three of Mission Possible from Insight Publishing (Click). Given that we all experience adversities in life, Dr. Rossetti’s testimony has universal relevance and appeal.
To reply to this Provision, use our Feedback Form. To talk with us about coaching or consulting services for yourself or your organization, Email Us or use our Contact Form on the Web for a complimentary coaching session.
LifeTrek Readers’ Forum (selected feedback from the past week)
Editor’s Note: The LifeTrek Readers’ Forum contains selections from the comments and materials sent in each week by the readers of LifeTrek Provisions. They do not necessarily reflect the perspective of LifeTrek Coaching International. To submit your comment, use our Feedback Formor Email Bob.
I wonder if anyone would like to participate in an e-group based coaching and support group. (Ed. Note. Wonderful idea. We have our coaching chat room available at http://www.LifeTrekCoaching.com/chat.)
May you be filled with goodness, peace, and joy.
Bob Tschannen-Moran, MCC, BCC
President, LifeTrek Coaching International, www.LifeTrekCoaching.com
CEO & Co-Founder, Center for School Transformation, www.SchoolTransformation.com
Immediate Past President, International Association of Coaching, www.CertifiedCoach.org
Author, Evocative Coaching: Transforming Schools One Conversation at a Time, Online Retailers
Address: 121 Will Scarlet Lane, Williamsburg, VA 23185-5043
Phone: (757) 345-3452 • Fax: (772) 382-3258
Skype: LifeTrek • Twitter: @LifeTrekBob
Subscribe/Unsubscribe: Subscriber Services